Exmormonology Ep. 58 An Intimate Interview with Amy Logan, Pt. 1

Jim turns the mic around and ask me some questions that I have never been asked before in regards to my mormon faith crisis. What a person goes through as they are deconstructing their religious brain is very intense. The thoughts and feelings seem to come at you so fast, you often cannot make sense of it all. You feel overwhelmed, betrayed and lonely. I did too.

I did not know the direction this particular episode would take. It went places I have not gone in a very long time. We had to break this down into two parts.

Take a walk with me, down memory lane as I share with you stories I have never spoken about publicly as my brain deconstructed all of it and how I came back to myself.

We spoke a little tiny bit about me growing up in the mormon church in the 70s & 80s and then we spend some time meanduring corners of my mind on topics along the lines of

• of being all in as a believing mormon and what that meant to me

• when the church became true for me

• being a young woman in the church

• connecting the spirit to the church being true with a capital T

• my testimony

• people IN the church

• how the church “owns” the source of love and how that creates testimony

• the unraveling of mormonism and confusion

• manipulation and fear tactics

• the problem with how we are presented with authority

• trusting myself

• staying in the believing closet

• deconstruction in sacrament meeting

• what does this all REALLY mean

• how the answers I was being given were no longer going to work

• how my whole life didn’t feel TRUE anymore

• thoughts about my life being a fraud

• having to step out of my comfort zone

• why sex should be fun

• my tipping point

• the mormon road map

• mormon harlequin romance novels and EFY music

• my body and garments

and more.

Part two coming next week.